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Old 25-11-2017, 12:19 AM   #481
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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How does that obese ****er have a butt crack in the front?
There was a term for that we used to use way back when but I won say it. It's not pc. Obviously mirrors are a new thing. Same as walking and doorways.
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Old 25-11-2017, 12:31 AM   #482
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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How does that obese ****er have a butt crack in the front?
It appears his shorts are pulling the fat surrounding his belly button together which has formed a vertical slit.
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Old 11-01-2018, 03:27 PM   #483
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that we pay council rates?
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Old 11-01-2018, 05:30 PM   #484
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why is it that we pay council rates?

image


Wow, 4 stop and go men just for 1 digger to cross the road.
Why did the digger cross the road?


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Old 11-01-2018, 05:37 PM   #485
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that the car in front of me today could only manage to labour along at 50km/h in the 80km/h zone while it was a solid white line but had no worries exceeding the 80km/h limit each time a dotted line appeared..?
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Old 11-01-2018, 05:44 PM   #486
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why is it that the car in front of me today could only manage to labour along at 50km/h in the 80km/h zone while it was a solid white line but had no worries exceeding the 80km/h limit each time a dotted line appeared..?


Because they were a ****tard!


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Old 11-01-2018, 05:52 PM   #487
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Because they were a ****tard!
True.
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Old 11-01-2018, 06:27 PM   #488
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why did the digger cross the Road?
I’m pretty sure they were going back to the shed for smoko
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Old 14-01-2018, 09:24 AM   #489
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that women are OK to be seen in bikinis in public but if you catch them in their underwear, they freak?

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Old 14-01-2018, 11:22 AM   #490
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why is it that women are OK to be seen in bikinis in public but if you catch them in their underwear, they freak?

image
Because logic and reason are concepts they are yet to grasp.
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Old 14-01-2018, 11:43 AM   #491
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it - most women at the checkouts at Coles and Woolies only decide to get their purse out to pay after the total amount is revealed? You stand there patiently for 5 -10 minutes as they put through $200 - $300 worth of groceries and then they decide to go through their handbag and purse looking for their card. "Oh, have you got a rewards card also"? Hold on i'll just rummage through my purse for another minute while I find that also. It must be a male thing, I have my cash or card out ready to go before the first item is scanned.

And don't get me started on parents letting their little angels press the buttons on the ATM machines while you wait behind them patiently. "Oh you pressed the wrong button silly billy, just start again, this man behind won't mind waiting" FFS!!

End of rant lol
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Old 14-01-2018, 11:50 AM   #492
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And don't get me started on parents letting their little angels press the buttons on the ATM machines while you wait behind them patiently. "Oh you pressed the wrong button silly billy, just start again, this man behind won't mind waiting" FFS!!

End of rant lol
Because we raise children these days without setting boundaries and look at where it is getting us.
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Old 14-01-2018, 12:23 PM   #493
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

My wife asked me to pass her the lip balm but I gave her some superglue instead.

She’s still not talking to me!
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:11 PM   #494
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it when I'm lying down with my eyes closed... People ask "are you sleeping?".

.... "No, just pretending I'm dead".
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:15 PM   #495
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

My personal favorite is when you cant find something is people ask where did you last have it
If i could remember that it wouldnt be lost!
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:18 PM   #496
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why is it when I'm lying down with my eyes closed... People ask "are you sleeping?".

.... "No, just pretending I'm dead".
Just checking my eyelids for holes.
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:19 PM   #497
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My personal favorite is when you cant find something is people ask where did you last have it
If i could remember that it wouldnt be lost!
The better question is "when do you last remember it?".

If I stop to ask myself that question, then put it out of my head and go about my business, 15 minutes later, boom, it pops into my head.
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:20 PM   #498
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Just checking my eyelids for holes.
Haha thats brilliant.
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:26 PM   #499
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that when I put my phone in my pocket it manages to ring somebody all on it's own, but when I want to make a call I have to turn it on, swipe screen , enter a code, go to contacts, find contact, press contact then press dial?
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:41 PM   #500
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that when people sms me and I voice call them back right away they don't answer their phone? you had it in you hand a second ago.
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Old 14-01-2018, 01:44 PM   #501
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that straight after I’ve sent someone an sms they feel the need to call, if I wanted to talk, I’d have called
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Old 14-01-2018, 05:32 PM   #502
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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My personal favorite is when you cant find something is people ask where did you last have it
If i could remember that it wouldnt be lost!
Or why is it people say 'it is always in the last place you look'? Obviously once you find it you will stop looking!
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Old 14-01-2018, 06:02 PM   #503
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it the when i take a phone call my missus feels the need to strike up a conversation with me?
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Old 14-01-2018, 08:46 PM   #504
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why is it that the English language especially written is falling apart??

Why don't supposedly educated people know the difference between simple words like

there, their, they're

bought, brought

here, hear

have, of ..... (this one especially has me stuffed, people using 'of' instead of 'have' seems to be the norm these days. as in 'I could of gone to the beach' instead of the correct 'I should have stayed home, this sun burn hurts and I can't get the sand out of my ****'.)

lose, loose

no, know

whole, hole

etc etc etc

It annoys me that kids are learning Japanese and various other languages at school, yet struggle with basic English and Mathematics.




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Old 14-01-2018, 08:47 PM   #505
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Awkward!
Totes awks.
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Old 14-01-2018, 11:07 PM   #506
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it that every second fool these days claims to be a "CEO"

In days gone by, small and even medium companies never used the title - it was only larger corporates, where they had an executive level of staff, that needed a "Chief" amongst them.

Now every 2nd news article has someone calling themselves a CEO of a sttartup, where they're the only person "employed" or it's a 2-5 person small business, or even worse - one I read today was a volunteer association that has 6 members, and the spokesperson for it called themselves the CEO! Hell every self-employed tradie is a CEO at the rate it's going.

It's like GT Falcons, for every 1 real CEO out there there's 25 more fakers claiming a few fancy letters.
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Old 14-01-2018, 11:18 PM   #507
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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Why is it that every second fool these days claims to be a "CEO"

In days gone by, small and even medium companies never used the title - it was only larger corporates, where they had an executive level of staff, that needed a "Chief" amongst them.

Now every 2nd news article has someone calling themselves a CEO of a sttartup, where they're the only person "employed" or it's a 2-5 person small business, or even worse - one I read today was a volunteer association that has 6 members, and the spokesperson for it called themselves the CEO! Hell every self-employed tradie is a CEO at the rate it's going.

It's like GT Falcons, for every 1 real CEO out there there's 25 more fakers claiming a few fancy letters.

At least Homer Simpson was executive vice-president of his company.
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Old 15-01-2018, 09:32 AM   #508
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Why is it.....

That these ignorant greenies fail to see the big picture, and continue to promote the "all about me" attitude?

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-01-1...arging/9235564

The article notes how the average fossil-fuel car, with 40% excise on fuel, contributes around 4.5c per km to road funding, whilst electric cars contribute nothing.
It then goes on to suggest a distance based, or "user pays" tax system for road funding - meaning owners of electric cars will have to contribute to funding the very roads they are using.

The article quotes a clown with a Tesla who is only willing to pay the distance tax on one condition - he wants an "air quality tax" on fossil fueled cars:
Quote:
"Western Australia resident Rob Dean, who has owned his Tesla Model S for more than three years, said he would be happy to pay a "fairly proportioned distance tax" to pay for his road use, but there's a catch.

"I would also expect any progressive government to add an air quality tax on fossil fuel vehicles that emit damaging tailpipe emissions into the air we breath, in turn placing a heavy burden on the health system," he said."
Where the F%*# does he think the power comes from for the majority of electric cars on the road?

Shifting emissions from the tailpipe to the power station is the reality these self-entitled elitists fail to see. Maybe 1 in 100 might be truly "green" charging only with solar, but they would be a very small minority, especially since WA, where he resides, generated just 7% of their power from renewable sources in 2014-2015: https://rac.com.au/home-life/info/st...e-energy-in-wa
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Old 15-01-2018, 10:24 AM   #509
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

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The article quotes a clown with a Tesla who is only willing to pay the distance tax on one condition - he wants an "air quality tax" on fossil fueled cars:


Where the F%*# does he think the power comes from for the majority of electric cars on the road?
From thin air of course...or does it grow on trees?...oh, I remember now, the tooth fairy.

That's it. That's the ticket.
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Old 15-01-2018, 10:45 AM   #510
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Default Re: Why is it.................?

Quote:
Originally Posted by commodorenutt View Post
Why is it that every second fool these days claims to be a "CEO"

In days gone by, small and even medium companies never used the title - it was only larger corporates, where they had an executive level of staff, that needed a "Chief" amongst them.

Now every 2nd news article has someone calling themselves a CEO of a sttartup, where they're the only person "employed" or it's a 2-5 person small business, or even worse - one I read today was a volunteer association that has 6 members, and the spokesperson for it called themselves the CEO! Hell every self-employed tradie is a CEO at the rate it's going.

It's like GT Falcons, for every 1 real CEO out there there's 25 more fakers claiming a few fancy letters.
It's this bullcrap environment of "entrepeneurship" that the media have been trying to ram down our throats. It has bred a rather silly environment that has all sorts of poo kickers thinking they too can be business owners and make it big. There's a reason 90% of startups fail...
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